Friday, August 9, 2013

Inquiry Upon Men & Strength


If a man can never be weak, then how can I ever be strong?

It has come to my attention in the past few days that, with certain people I am close to, they hide themselves behind whatever veneer (or turn off their camera) when it comes to them getting upset, perhaps coming to tears. I've always been this way, myself, but people can always tell when I'm depressed; I have the emotions come off of me in waves that I cannot succor or ride, I'll admit to it. Then I have friends who refuse to be strong, always depending upon someone else to lift them up and to carry them down the beach when they have stumbled; this is fine, just...grow a pair, once in a while. The world will not end when you lose a nail, that's all I'm saying. And I say this with the most love and sensitivity that I can muster, because, right now, I'm the one being carried.

So, why do men always hide their tears? Because they're a symbol of weakness, yes? I declare otherwise. The fact that they refuse to be weak is a sign of weakness itself; they, too, get insecure and sensitive, but they refuse to let other people help them through it. I see this as an opportunity of bonding, but males typically hide that chance away. A very, very good friend of mine recently lost someone close to him, and it was the first time I had ever seen him in such a state. The fact that this was the first time was quite terrifying, I will not lie, because I didn't know what to do to fix anything, and he was to stubborn to even let me try. Which absolutely killed me, inside. Even when he was at his weakest point, he was still trying to be strong. But, you know what? I say to let the tears flow. "Pain is weakness leaving the body"? Then let the tears flow! If you refuse to be weak, then how can others, by comparison, beside you, prove that they, too, can be strong? This doesn't mean start crying over the slightest of things; it just means to let a little bit more show. Bit by bit, letting someone in...that's the most magic. Learning to trust is second to learning to love. Both take a lot of hard work and two-sided effort, and one helps to accomplish the other.

Emotions and words are stronger than one may think, at times. "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words cannot hurt me." Whoever made this statement has nevereven set foot inside of a school, any grade, any region, any race, any culture, any school. Or social setting. Because, as I look around me, I see people's light leaving their eyes as they interact. I love my friends; I really do. And I've lost two in the past semester due to my lack of sense and taking my words out on them. Three years ago, I also lost a friend, whom I recently reconnected with, over conflicting words.

Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions.Watch your actions; they become habit.Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.― Lao Tzu
   
It's brief, shorter than I would typically think to write, but I think I get my point across.  Words cause pain, pain causes tears.  Tears are a stress-relieving element, and, yes, you need to show that you are indeed human; no one wants to fall for a mechanical robot who can't process human emotions, nor acknowledge when to comfort, when in need.  People need their chance to shine, and if you don't let them, you, yourself, become weak.

Your quote is the one by Lao Tzu.
Enjoy.
Scotty
~♥